05.30.08 WEEKEND PICKS: KIMBO IS A GIRL’S NAME
What to watch for in this weekend's biggest matchups. One team or another in ALL CAPS.
KIMBO SLICE over Johnny Tomatocan — I appreciate that Slice is a complete badass, but I think it's telling that his only MMA opponents so far have been Boxcar Ira, Boxcar Fritz, and Switchyard Sullivan. Which brings me to…
UFC over EliteXC — Don't get me wrong, I'm looking forward to watching people hurt each other on Saturday night without having to shell out bucks for Pay-Per-View, but I have to agree with just about everything in Dan Wetzel's takedown over on Yahoo. One star does not a legitimate league make. And neither does one starfucker. I'm looking at you, Tito Ortiz. (Nice catch by Brooks)
Lesbians over MARINERS — I'm not talking about what I'd rather watch. I'm saying nine bull dykes could take two of three from the M's.
PISTONS over Celtics (Game 6, 8:30 Eastern tonight) – Wait, is Rip Hamilton playing or not? Ah, well: I still don't think the C's can close out a series on the road.
THE RACONTEURS over Pistons-Celtics — How come bands I like never play seven-game concerts?
That's all for another week. Go get some sun. You're not looking well.

There are 25 comments about:
WEEKEND PICKS: KIMBO IS A GIRL’S NAME
Good God, that caption's funny.
I'll be trying to find any excuse I can to say that over the weekend.
1990s Jenna >>>>>>>>>>>> present day Jenna
Isn't that….? Of Course!!! I should have realized sooner…. That's Jenna's signature pose.
I said put it in my mouth. I said my motherfuckin mo-ow-owouth
SHe said put it in her mouth.
Put it in my mouth!
Put it in her mouth.
My motherfuckin mou-ow-owuth
That's one hell of a big invisible cock.
It appears to be about 7:50 local time.
"How come bands I like never play seven-game concerts?"
How come basketball teams I like don't invite my girlfriend to do coke with them after the game?
/saves image
/enlarges image to lifesize scale
/prints out image at kinkos
/facefucks poster
/cries self to sleep
@monkeyknifefight:
At least you have the self control to go to Kinko's. I just poked a hole in my monitor.
Hey, what about ENGLAND over Trinidad and Tobago. After brushing aside the might of the USA midweek(your boys took a hell of a beating), the Failure 67 - 08 and Beyond Tour reaches the Caribbean. Meanwhile the genuine European powerhouses train for something called Euro 2008. A tournament so irrelevant we couldn't even be fucked to qualify for it.
…just so we're clear. I was crying because of the papercuts, not the shame.
I'd know that vacant stare anywhere
Kimbo's opponent got knocked out by BUTTERBEAN. Like, in an MMA fight. Dude's like 6'5", yet somehow got knocked out by a guy with 18" arms. My prediction? 22 seconds. Mark it.
Jenna….Oh Jenna….How you wore yourself out…The shitty part, it isn't without my help…
no faber v pulver predictions? no one likes to watch little gremlins fight?
Yeah Kimbo's opponent (James "Colossus" Thompson) has a glass jaw in every sense of the word. Worse yet, he usually bum rushes his opponent only to get cracked in the jaw once and drop to the floor like a sack full of dead hookers.
But no mention of the two ladies fighting on the same card? What, do you people only like your women punching you in the face, and not one another? Because it's all foreplay to serious perverts…
Pics:
http://www.combatlifestyle.com/pics/albums/053008weighins/1018.jpg
http://i97.photobucket.com/albums/l220/girljock007/gina1.jpg
http://assets.sbnation.com/imported_assets/5449/katlin_medium.jpg
no faber v pulver predictions? no one likes to watch little gremlins fight?
Faber TKO in 3 via rape-choke gnp
But no mention of the two ladies fighting on the same card?
goddammit i'm only unfunny enough to post once in a while, but it's an mma weekend so fuckit. FUCKIT! fuckit. kaitlin young looks tough. gina could be in trouble if she tries to stand up in this one. but those tities are…tits. i mean tits as in badass. gloriously badass, beautiful tits.
I wish I was "In The VIP" for that afterparty!
/rimshot
Is that a screen shot from "The Invisible Manbroth"?
She is so hot and sexy..so many mature men want to date with her,but I hear she just dates a rich men at the dating site called **JSeniorMatch .c om**..do you want to know more about her? her profile is really interesting.
Marineros Ufford? This is just sad. Almost as bad as "Los Suns"
<p><b>I am just a bit curious…Her profile was found on interracial dating site 'blacklatinmeet.com' last week. I heard she just broke up with her boyfriend! I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site!</b></p>
<p><b>I am just a bit curious…Her profile was found on interracial dating site 'Black Latin Meet Com' last week. I heard she just broke up with her boyfriend! I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site!</b></p>
I can't stop listening to the new Raconteurs album.
I'm all for big titted drummers but Jack White needs to quit the White Stripes BS and stick with the Raconteurs for good. I can't imagine "Attention" not being the Most Popular rock song in the country if they release it as a single.
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