Every year, SI snags a female athlete to don a bikini in order to give the Swimsuit Issue some tenuous connection to the world of sports, and if I can appreciate anything, it's girls in bikinis with some tenuous connection to the world of sports. This year's athlete/model is Formula 1 driver Danica Patrick, whom I've always felt bad for because assholes call her a failure because she's never won an F-1 race. The Anna Kournikova of racing, they say.
Well, fuck those people. That's like putting me under the microscope if I got pregnant but miscarried. "Sure, he can get pregnant with all the other women, but he didn't actually give birth. In my book he'll always be just another good-looking man until he pushes a baby through the birth canal he doesn't have." …Um, so that metaphor was kinda weird, but my point is that people who criticize her for being getting more endorsements for being attractive than for winning should be punched in the cock.
Anyway, in addition to her swimsuit gallery — pleasant, but not super-sexy or anything — SI also has a modestly entertaining interview with her conducted by Dan Patrick. You see, because his name is Dan Patrick and her name is Danica Patrick! Dan, Danica, same last name — why, they're practically the same person! I can barely tell them apart!
Informative UPDATE: Smarty commenter DixieWrecked points out that Danica does Indy racing, which is different from F-1 in that it's basically the same thing.
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Uma, Oprah, Oprah, Uma. That's all I've got.
why, they're practically the same person! I can barely tell them apart!
I believe I know a way.
his name is Dan Patrick and her name is Danica Patrick! Dan, Danica, same last name — why, they're practically the same person!
Does that mean I shouldn't be jerking off to the Cousins Subs commercials? My penis is easily fooled.
Unfortunately this is lost on most NASCAR
inbredsfansThe whore needs to win a race or go full nude. Her bikini shots and mere top ten finishes are proverbial.
This reminds me of the Dan Patrick swimsuit shoot I saw in Esquire. Only I don't feel anywhere near as guilty about my erection.
….people who criticize her for being getting more endorsements for being attractive than for winning should be punched in the cock.
Well, I think the problem some have is not that she is using her sexiness as a way to get that paper. Its that she has said in past interviews that she wants to be seen as an athlete/driver first and foremost, all the while posing bent over a car or in a bikini.
That being said, I would greatly enjoy it if she allowed me to place my erect penis inside of her vagina for the purposes of achieving climax. So to speak.
She's an IndyCar driver. F-1 is the Eurocentric series where they line the cars up on the starting line in the expected order of finish and admonish them not to get out of line for the entire "race."
People should be more respectful to these broads.
To all the critics – if an attractive woman wants to pose suggestively in skimpy attire (or less), fuck off and let them. If there's anything that American flag tramp stamp Danica has above her finely toned buttocks stands for, it's the right of attractive women to pose suggestively in skimpy attire (or less).
God bless America.
maybe not "super-sexy" pics, but 100 times better than anything GoDaddy has shown her in.
let's compare: tiny bikini vs. oversided leather coat w/ a fuck ugly logo on it of a bald guy w/ a steaming head and green glasses?
waste of talent
If there's anything that American flag tramp stamp Danica has above her finely toned buttocks stands for, it's
me plastering a map of Hawaii right on top of it.
You are right, that was a pretty shitty analogy!!!
Hawaii? Braggart. I could give her American Samoa or the Virgin Islands.
One main difference between Dan and Danica is one's a great piece and the other's got a great hairpiece.
JIZABELL or SUCKNLICK? These SEXSEARCH.com banner ads have so many options.
Oh… yeah Danica Patrick. Whatever.
@Tim
Yea, when did With Leather turn into a porn site. Was that today?
[madethemjumplikerodstrickland.blogspot.com]
Does the fact that her Tramp Stamp is an American Flag make it any less whoreish?
Danica does Indy racing which is different from F-1 in that it's basically the same thing.
Not true, you ignorant slut. Indy racing is when you challenge Harrison Ford to a forty yard dash, and F-1 is Battleship coordinates.
/sounded funny in my head
she looks pretty good, i almost wish i didn't just finish beatin' off
and ditto that to almost every other post today, but hey there is always tomorrow.
Danica is what we in the Nasty 'Nati like to call west-side-hot. She's about as good as it gets. If her teeth were a bit jacked up, she could pass as Hamilton-hot.
tomorrow, who am i kidding, give me 10 minutes.
picture 23 of her gallery has dude pointing a fucking radar gun at her?
"Does the fact that her Tramp Stamp is an American Flag make it any less whoreish?"
No, but that's beside the point.
TRANNY ALERT
I would still jump at the chance to inspect Danica's muffler.
am I honestly supposed to believe that a girl can drive a car better than me? I think she's came in 2nd place a few times only because all the other drivers want to punch her pretty little kitten… all the other drivers except for Jean Girard that is. And to be quite frank, who could blame them? she's totally F-able.
Does anybody proof read this crap BEFORE they print it? F1 and Indy cars are basically the same thing? Spoken like a true clueless non-race fan. There, I have joined and vented my spleen all in the same 10 minutes. I feel good now…
If she was to join NASCAR, I might almost watch.
…if they get rid of those stupid roof flaps.