WEEKEND PICKS: HOT DIVISIONAL ACTION
01.11.08
What to watch for in this weekend's biggest picks. Home team in ALL CAPS.
PACKERS over Seahawks — I don't expect the Seahawks to beat a better team in an away game. I'm already coming to grips with a Packers win, in part because I feel so sorry for anyone who has to live in Green Bay.
Giants over COWBOYS — Eh, one of the away teams has to win this weekend, right? Right? Hello, anyone?
The Daily Northwestern over The Lantern — Oh sure, Ohio State has superior sports teams, but you can't compete with Wildcat journalistic integrity! Especially when you inadvertently compare your football team's loss to 9/11.
COLTS over Chargers — San Diego fans can seek comfort in going outside and realizing they don't live in Indianapolis.
Stand-up comedy over JAGS-PATS — Her: "Hey, wanna see a comedy show on Saturday night?" Me: "Yeah, sure! I got nothin' else going on!" Dammit.
UFFORD over Neiswanger – I'm gonna remember this poor journalist every time I think my last name sucks.
Thanks for hangin' out, everybody. I had a lot of fun this week. Be sure to check in this weekend, and I'll see you back here on Monday morning. 9:30 sharp. Well, more like 9:45 … ish.
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Stay Classy Columbus! Buncha fuckin dipshits.
"Neiswanger". Fucking awesome.
His first name is Heydood.
No offense to the fine people of Indianapolis, but why the fuck do people live there?
It's cold in the winter. There are no mountains to snowboard on when it's cold. It's muggy as hell in the summer. There are no mountains to escape to when it's muggy as hell. Are the farmer's daughters really that hot? Doesn't matter. Come winter they are wearing a parka and moonboots. Fucking gomers….
Matt, a good friend of mine got his wife tickets to 'Wicked' for Saturday night, not realizing it was playoff weekend. So you could be seeing a fucking musical instead of playoff football.
There's always someone worse off.
His name could be Smallwanger. At least it's complimentary as is.
It could always be worse. You could actually be at the Colts game sitting next to this fat fuck and his fat fucking fingers. He should be shot in the back of the head waiting in line for dippin dots. Fat fuck.
[youtube.com]
Unless they change the shape of the ball to better suit Eli's limp-wristed throwing style and heavy-flow pussy plug, I think RHomo and the Dallas (I don't see no horns…) Cowboys run away with this one.
I'd like to fuck that cheerleader.
You better get some action for a stupid comedy show.
@Mr. Bananagrabber
First it was the Packer x-mas carol video and now a kid face-diving into a bucket of popcorn. Never before have I wanted to bludgeon this many children.
@ Bananagraber.
Agreed. I would love to see this kid slayed. Hostel 1 stylee.
@ Kennedy
That's a Cowboys cheerleader dipshit, not a Colts. Also, as a former resident of Indy for 2 years, I'll be the first to admit that it's an absolute shitfuck there, but to cover your points; a) Indy has a very mild winter, northern Indiana gets cold cause they get fooked with lake effect blizzards bi-weekly. b) not that muggy, if you've ever been to Chicago, you would know what the fuck is muggy, and what is sufficiently warm and moist (hehe). c) yes, most of the chicks there are either totally bangin' or already have feed bags and slop buckets attached to their faces, so its really a free for all, guy to girl ratio in that state is through the roof.
Regardless, Indiana absolutely IS the fattest state in the Union, so if you wanna make fun of Dallas, or the Cowboys cheerleaders, have at it, Texans have a half-a-brain cell surplus keeping them from actually being Mexicans, so its an easy target to hit, but if you wanna bust on Indy, I would stick to the Speedway, the density of the population of fat fucks as Bananagraber has so graciously highlighted, or just head straight for the jugular and start railing off NASCAR redneck jokes, cause we all well know that's what Indy is really all about.
Besides, my ex-girlfriend was pretty fuckin hot and she made me forget about all the fat fucks roaming the open plains there.
That cheerleader's thighs pull me in close like a moth to a flame. A moth with a rapist wit.
I'm assuming that "HER" is aware that after Saturday, no one will ever see her again.
Regardless, Indiana absolutely IS the fattest state in the Union
Swany, I've got Wisconsin on line two – says it's regarding you being wrong.
Negative. Mississippi aparently. I would have thought those bastards would have sweat all that fried shit and cajun calories out in the bayou.
[calorielab.com]
Indy was fattest in '03
I called a girl fat once. She thought I meant P-H-A-T "fat". I said yeah Pork, Ham, And Turkey. She dumped her drink on me. Once again, I let another slump-buster walk out of my life.
That show better not be Dane Cook. Oh wait, you said comedy.
PS–the woman in the photograph is fortunate in her looks. On a completely unrelated note, any tips on how to remove one's DNA from a computer monitor would be greatly appreciated.
Man, this is the only place I could go to get a healthy dose of Seahawks homerism. Now you're going to go and actually make informed picks? Well, I'm sticking with blind home team faith until the end.
how about not being able to dunk over JAMMING ON LOOSE HOOPS
[www.ejb.com]
cool game create your own city
[gilykarla.myminicity.com]
Does phil simms provide an escort service or is the 3-hour long fellatio that he provides every Sunday only for Tom Brady?