This Saturday in Vegas, UFC fighter Tim Sylvia will take on Antonio Rodrigo Noguiera at UFC 81 – bound to be the most important numerical event this weekend – for the right to regain the heavyweight title he lost last March.
If he wins, he says, he'll have a smile on his face for the whole human race. He also said he'll never remove the title belt, even for sex.
“I’ve had sex before with the belt on. That was back in the Ricco Rodriguez days. The night I won the belt I had a sexual experience with the belt on. But hey, I was 25 years old and it was the biggest thing that ever had happened to me in my life. The girl was like hey, are you going to take that thing off. And I said no, I’m not…I’m wearing it and if you have a problem with it, then I’m leaving. And I hate to say it, but if I do win the belt again, then this time it’s never coming off. I’m going to wear it a lot more.”
Kind of a boon to any future wife and kids. What's the accomplished fighter gonna hit them with now? -Christmas Ape
Admission: I can't even wear my regular belt because I'm allergic to the nickel in the buckle. It gives me a horrible rash. I'm also allergic to wearing the pants it holds up. It's the real reason I never became a champion MMA fighter.
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Good to see Herc from the Wire getting work after being canned from the force.
Ape, I thought the reason you never became an MMA fighter was your nickname: "The Screaming Hemophiliac."
Most of my sexual experiences have also involved belts. It's the ladies who wear them, though. Why don't they take them off? Because the back of my van is too small for them to move.
I've been known to wear socks while having sex.
I bet if you have a championship belt you get to have good sex. Like with the lights on and no crying.
I've been known to
wearuse socks while having "sex."@Hugh, I think we all have at one point during our lifetime.
I'm going to go ahead and read a bit more into Tim's comments and assume he's saying that he had cowbowy gay sex with Ricco Rodriguez back when he was 25. I don't know that Ricco appreciates being called "the girl" though.
I hope Silvia's entrance music is Flock of Seagulls, because I have the fleeing from Noguiera the whole night.
Sweep the leg
*I have the feeling he'll be fleeing. That makes more sense. I'm retarded.
A UFC belt during sex sounds Un-Fucking-Comfortable. I wonder if spooge adds to the luster and sheen.
Hopefully, Sylvia's plan to lean on Noguiera for 25 minutes won't work this weekend.
Also, they say that Sylvia used to sleep with the belt – I had no idea that's what they meant.
Pauly – it makes the pleather more supple.
That's fucking gross. I've said it before and I'll say it again, sex with Tim Sylvia should be illegal.
Also, if you've never watched Tim Sylvia get "kicked to the curb" on Blind Date, you're missing out.
[www.youtube.com];
I’m wearing it and if you have a problem with it, then I’m leaving.
It should be the other way around!! He has to be the one getting it in the pooper.
I was never a champion MMA fighter because opponents took my thumb in their ass the wrong way. Seriously who here wouldn't tap out?
Nice find Lance – I'm stealing that.
@shan – are you doing a wiggle? or just a straight insert.
i mean…. *raises hand*
I don't blame Sylvia, look what happened to Pootie Tang when he took off his belt.
@Merk – he said "the wrong way" but I think that could use some clarification. Diff'rent strokes…
Good point, Flubby. You're a baddy daddy lamatai tebby chai!
I'm just like Sylvia except that I won't take my fanny pack off during coitus. Where else am I supposed to store my throwaway camera, chap stick, KY, and chloroform?
I can just imagine the scene if this chump loses the fight.
He'll reluctantly hand the belt to Noguiera and Noguiera'll be like, "Yeah, you know what. I'll just wait for the belt company to make me a new one, thanks."
Oscar De La Hoya can suggest a belt for any outfit.
Sadly a little while later Randy Couture came along and had sex with that same girl harder and better.