Navy vs Utah! Ships vs Geology! It\'s fucking ON!

Once again we've got another NFL game (Steelers-Rams) on Thursday night, and once again who gives a fuck.  Hey, NFL Network: I don't have you and can't get you.  And that would make you just like Scarlett Johansson if I actually wanted you.  Drop Gumbel in a wood chipper and maybe we'll talk.

That leaves the Fuck You, Corporate Sponsors Poinsettia Bowl between Utah and Navy on ESPN.  Or, as I like to call it, the Battle of Running Backs Overcoming Heartbreaking Adversity.  Yesterday, Deadspin highlighted the trials of the Utes' Darrell Mack (drug addict mom murdered with lug wrench, father in prison for life for murder, grandfather who raised him died last week, and he's dyslexic).  It's amazing that Mack has made it as far as he has, but let's not forget the story of Navy's slotback Zerbin Singleton:

Singleton… is on track to reach his ultimate goal of becoming an astronaut. He boasts a 3.1 grade-point average as an aerospace engineering major and last month was named Brigade Commander [leader of all students at the Academy] for the second semester.

Singleton was initially raised in Alaska by his mother, but was left an orphan at age 11 after she was sent to jail for a parole violation. He moved to Decatur, Ga., to live with cousins and did not meet his father until he was a senior in high school. One year later, after the two had begun to build a relationship, Singleton's father committed suicide.

…Singleton graduated Columbia High with honors and accepted an appointment to the Naval Academy [but] was involved in an accident with a drunk driver one week before he was scheduled to graduate as class valedictorian. Undeterred, Singleton spent a year at Georgia Tech then transferred to the academy and joined the football team as a walk-on. The 5-foot-8, 164-pounder has [rushed] for 478 yards and nine touchdowns, all but one of which have come in the last four games.

And his name is "Zerbin."  Tough break, buddy.