It's been a while since I've done a recap of the previous night's NBA games. Let's take a quick look at some select games from a busy night in the Association:
Suns 100, Spurs 95 — There's some history here. Last season I refused to acknowledge the existence of the NBA Playoffs after the Suns got the Grande Deluxe Dicking from David Stern, the refs, Satan, and a second shooter from the grassy knoll. This time the Suns used a balanced attack to overcome Tim Duncan's monster game (36/17). Tony Parker missed his third straight game with acute vaginitis.
Cavs 104, Bucks 99 (2OT) – Are you kidding me? Two overtimes and the teams barely got to 200 points combined? Here's the game report card: F-. NEXT.
Hawks 116, Jazz 111 — Dear Jerry Sloan, your fucking pick-and-roll will never be enough. EVER. But go ahead and keep doing it for another 20 years. Dipshit.
Mavs 111, Magic 108 — Two weeks ago everyone was praising the Magic as the Beasts of the East 2.0 (behind the C's) and wondering what was wrong with the struggling Mavs. But with this game — sealed in the final minutes Dirk Nowitzki (31 points) — Dallas has won five of six, while Orlando has LOST five of six. What a crazy coincidence. And now they're BOTH 17-9! OMG! Call the Twilight Zone guy!
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Why does it say Basketball! Basketball! Basketball!, but only have to do with Professional Basketball? Maybe include some college basketball stuff, namely from my Jayhawks, so that everyone can make fun of me.
Thanks,
Me
Fuck college basketball.
Anyone else wanna ask for WNBA scores?
Anyone else wanna ask for WNBA scores?
No need; I have DirecTV's "WNBA Season Pass." It was included in the "Tony Parker Package" with Lifetime, Oxygen and the Emasculation Channel.
Dear Jerry Sloan, your fucking pick-and-roll will never be enough. EVER.
I hear they're working on running the picket fence. But then Deron Williams' father showed up drunk to the game and everything went to hell in a hurry.
Anyone else wanna ask for WNBA scores?
I don't think they keep scores.
I wanna hear about college basketball too! Like that one game, where they passed the ball 10 times on each posession, then they shot a 3-pointer from the too-close 3-point line? That game was awesome! Fuck driving and post-play; I wanna see them shoot the goddamn 3! And 50-46 final scores! Yay!
College basketball does indeed suck.
I thought the WNBA was an optimist league. I Learn something new everyday.
@WWSM: Kirilenko got caught watching the paint dry.
Anyone else wanna ask for WNBA scores?
No need, I've got Sue Bird locked up in the basement.
"Maybe include some college basketball stuff, namely from my Jayhawks, so that everyone can make fun of me."
Mission Accomplished
Anyone else wanna ask for WNBA scores?
No, but can you give me a rundown of last night's Women's College Basketball "Action"?
Robert Horry: badass mofo.
(you made me do it)
Fuck college basketball.
That's how I feel since Lute Olsen's departure. It's like your girlfriend you've been with forever breaks up with you. If your girlfriend has silver hair and borderline dimensia/parkinson's.
looks like Horry is positioning Nash for a lil "make up" session in that picture.
I thought Horry had no asshole… You know, cause he is full of shit…. YES!
I wanna hear about pro basketball too! Like that one game, where they passed it once and jacked up a shot while being triple teamed and then didn't bother playing defense. Fuck fundamental basketball, i want selfishness and boring basketball! And 500-498 scores! Yayyyy!
Pro basketball does indeed suck.
driving and post play? you mean flopping as soon as someone bumps you and throwing it into the 7' so he can dribble with it for 15 seconds and take a contested shot while the other 4 players stand around? yeah, that's REAL GOOD basketball. idiot.