HOW COULD BRAD SAY NO TO THIS?
11.20.07I'm sad to say that I missed last night's finale of The Bachelor, but Jen's Free Throws has the full report on our gal Jenni the Suns dancer, who was one of the final two options for Bachelor Brad. And that full report is… Jenni lost. But so did the other chick, so I guess it was kind of a tie?
Yes, you read that right: Brad chose being alone over mashing Jenni's guts. All Jenni wants to do is model and birth babies and smile and dance around in Lycra, but Brad decided he's too good for all that. Well, to hell with Brad. I'd marry Jenni tomorrow. I'm not getting any younger. And this tumor isn't getting any smaller. Think the Suns offer health care to spouses?

Her impersonation of Jim Carey as the grinch must have been the deal breaker.
So she yells out "Heath Ledger" during uninhibited moments. Meh. If I can put up with "Mein Furher–I can walk!" I can certainly power through that.
You think the Suns offer health care to spouses?
Good question. Maybe you should ask Raja Bell's life partner.
I would do her even if she had razor blades inside her vagina.
I love that she's danced for three teams and her job is working in the reception area at a dental office. That's a far more lucrative position than I had suspected.
"We need Jenny from Dr. Smith's office in Dallas. She's the single best receptionist south of the Mason-Dixon. Jones, make that happen, money is no object!"
The other chick was even hotter. Big tits. Thick ass. Southern accent. Jenni's a little 'toothy'.
She's also a dancer for the Phonex Mercury? How low is your self esteem if you're a woman dancing in support of a WNBA team? And how hard is it to get a binding restraining order thrown at Cheryl Miller?
Is HoHosWeKnows banging Dr. Strangelove? Very funny. She's got more teeth than the Tooth Fairy - i might be referring to the serial killer from Red Dragon there, but i've not decided yet.
Bachelor Brad is waiting for Brady to come out of the closet…
I'd feed that horse a carrot.
DDH, Razorbaldes in her what? Here's a little movie trailer for ya':
[www.iesb.net]
Brad chose being alone over mashing Jenni's guts.
Is that a euphemism for sex or a cannibal recipe? Either way, I'm aroused.
and she was a former Cowboys cheerleader? Oh yeah she can get it. And I mean, I'd convince her that this Alabama black snake ain't too goddamn boucoup.
Hmm the other chick was hotter with a thick ass? Guess I need to (gasp) go to the bachelor website… I'm going in…pray for my safe return.
The Phoenix Mercury Hip Hop Dancers?!? I am going to assasinate someone.
What? Bachelor Brad passed up on her?
(Cue Glory Of Love by Peter Cetera)
Pauly will fight for your honor Jenni.
Wow. Even Peter Cetera forgot he sang that song. Who knew Karate Kid fame could be so fleeting? I mean, apart from Ralph Macchio.
@Angel Eyes–I'm not saying, but I'm not not saying.
Not to worry Jenni….as long as I have a face, you'll always have a place to take a piss.
(apologies to Jim Norton)
Its the laugh. No grown man could deal with that for more than 2 months, tops.