BO KNOWS EXECUTING BEARS | With Leather - Sports news and gossip, panda sex, and the occasional Toonces the driving cat Photoshop

In case you haven't read it already, I highly recommend ESPN.com's E-ticket piece on Bo Jackson. It examines Bo's life twenty years after his rise to prominence, covering everything from his Paul Bunyan-like mythology to the memorable marketing campaign to his simple life in suburban Chicago, where his extracurricular pleasures include bow-hunting and being intense. The story leads off with what would sound like a tall tale if it were anyone besides Bo Jackson:

From behind the wheel of an obscenely muscled Dodge pickup, Vincent Edward "Bo" Jackson is reminiscing about the time he took down a 300-pound bear from point-blank range with a .45-caliber pistol… and if you're wondering whether Bo was scared, hell no, Bo was not scared. Not even when that bear got so close Bo and his hunting companion could see the hairs bolt upright like pine needles on the back of its neck…

The way Bo tells it, he waited as long as he could, then he fired a slug into that bear's skull. The bear kept coming. His buddy yelled, "Shoot him again!" and Bo shot him again, firing another bullet directly into the bear's noggin. Bo 2, Bear 0. And then Bo skinned that bear on the spot and dragged the 70-pound hide the half-mile back to camp. Of course he did.

Oh sure, it sounds impressive. If you're a coward or a weakling. Three hundred pounds isn't even that big for a bear. Black bears weigh up to 600 pounds, while the more ferocious grizzly bear tops out at 1500 pounds. That bear was smaller than Tony Siragusa. And less deserving of a bullet in the skull.

There are 37 comments about:
BO KNOWS EXECUTING BEARS

Comment Pages: 1 2 »

November 29th, 2007 at 12:32 pm

hardawayhatesyou says:

Ah yes…..getting close to an animal in its habitat and killing it. What a sport. Good times.

November 29th, 2007 at 12:35 pm

wacha_talkin_bout_willus says:

Bo knows hyperbole

swanychitown says:

Actually, the Kodiak Bear in Alaska is bigger than the Grizzly. But I'm sure you knew that. What suburb is Bo in? I wanna go and stalk his house.

Also, am I the only one that thinks fighting a bear would be the absolute best way to die other than while taking a once-in-a-lifetime shit or while banging a filthy high-class whore in Vegas?

November 29th, 2007 at 12:36 pm

UpstateUnderdog says:

Chuck Norris would have just given the bear a front snap kick.

November 29th, 2007 at 12:37 pm

Big Nabs says:

I would have shot him in the ass with my lamp-gun.

November 29th, 2007 at 12:38 pm

alumnigonzo says:

That bear was smaller than Tony Siragusa

The people of London would be no less impressed though.

November 29th, 2007 at 12:39 pm

Anonymous says:

Michael Vick should have shot his dogs.

In the skull.

UU, Bob Sanders would have just looked at the bear and it would have collapsed with a massive heart attack.

November 29th, 2007 at 12:45 pm

doogieinrichmond says:

The bear would have had a heart attack if it saw Chucks Beard go up like a pine needles.

Pauly says:

Bob Costas on the other hand would wipe every bear off the face of the earth, including Teddy bears, Care bears, Gummy bears, the Chicago Bears and that stupid Paddington Bear. And he would do it by a snap of the fingers.