"WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I scored!!! All right, who's ready for my celebration? I promised entertainment, and you are about to get it! Just as soon as I get over to the sideline! One second. Yep, gotta run over to the bench first. Hold on. Wait a sec. Oh, this is gonna be sweet. Hold on, sometimes it takes a while. Wait for it. Wait. It's about to happen. Just gotta get it out of this trash bag. PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE FAILED EXTRA POINT! Okay. Okay. Okaaaaaaaay…. it's about to happen… NOW. Ta-da! Future Hall of Famer, baby! Wooo! How's that for spur-of-the-moment excitement?"
More NFL…
For those of you interested in things like "scores" and "recaps" (losers), the Bengals survived a hard-hitting, sloppy, and exciting game against the Ravens last night, prevailing 27-20 after a courageous goal-line stand that ended in an interception by diving defensive lineman Michael Myers. This was after the Bengals had held the line for three downs, allowed a Todd Heap touchdown on 4th down that was negated by offensive pass interference, and given the Ravens a fresh set of downs with an illegal contact penalty on the next 4th down play. Much excitement, and very enjoyable if you don't have debilitating heart disease.
The late game provided a similarly exciting finish, but was preceded by 57 minutes of crap. At least that's what the recap of the Niners' 20-17 win over the Cards told me. I sure as hell didn't watch. But hey, Alex Smith was apparently Joe Montana against Arizona for one drive. And whatever they used to call Candlestick Park is now Bill Walsh Field, which I think is nice. Not quite as nice as my abs, but then what is?


Not quite as nice as my abs, but then what is?
Tony Little says all you need is his Ab Isolator and good TECHNIQUE!!
Man that guy is a gigantic bag of douche-juice.
So what Ocho-cinco. After the game most of his teammates take off their uniforms to reveal bright orange jumpsuits.
I'm Sorry, I always thought that the game itself was the entertainment, and that it was a team sport. The players are just there to play the game. Chad Johnson isn't an entertainer, he is an athlete, and it is totally dissrespectful to the guys like Art Monk who truely belong in the hall of fame to pull that crap. Maybe I'm old fashion, but honestly, the MNF crew almost missed the missed extra point bc they wanted to show CJ showing off on the sidelines. How bout patting Carson Palmer on the back for placing that ball in the perfect spot? CJ just had to run his ass over there and get under it. He is a clown.
jesus christ. calm down – the guy put on an oversized novelty jacket and you're bitching about art monk already?
I was so busy trying to determine if the gold in Chad’s mouth was his mouth guard or his teeth that I must’ve missed Jesus walking on to the Raven side line to make sure Ray Lewis’s arm was OK.
Dude you stfu. Was this the first time he cried me me me? No. I'ma start calling CJ TO pretty soon dickface.
Thanks Larry Fitzgerald. Nice game.
That was also the first time he directly dissrespected someone. Like he thinks the NFL was shit or something before he got there? Like he is the first monky to think that its all show?
Swany, simmer down. Unfunny and serious is no way to start the day.
And there it is….'like he is the first monky'……that train's never late, huh swany?
Todd Heap broke my heart. I lost by 2 points in my league. This is the only time I will bring it up.
Why can't he just do The Icky Shuffle??? It's the greatest celebration of all time!!!
I can't decide which is more overrated — Chad Johnson, or his celebrations.
If I were an evil man, I would be praying for a career-ending knee injury for this ass-clown.
How is this even a celebration? During the winter I put a coat on everyday, sometimes twice! (I can't afford heat on what Matt pays me.)
Chad Johnson is running out of semi-decent ideas. Maybe he should have used Stuart Scott's idea. BOO-NO.
Cincinnati has a pro football team?
Hugh was supposed to be there helping out with the celebration, but Ocho Cinco couldn't find him anywhere.
He should've tap danced….. of a cliff.
Sorry, I'm back, I had a bad doctors appt this morning. FYI, Monk*ey was not intended as a racial slur or anything of that sort HHY and Matt. No disrespect meant. Just a shitty morning ace. Sorry.
Does he realize that at this point in his career, he is not Hall of Fame caliber??? Dude's already 29 and has nothing to show for except for the fact that he plays for a team that some people think are good until they realize they are still out of Ohio, he does have good seasons but compared to guys that are already in and Marv Harrison, no chance yet…his only chance is if Carson decides he wants to win a Super Bowl/Chimpionship (Swany) and they buy a new defense, and oh yeah, the criminal thing is kind of holding them back too, sooner or later he will be the next one, get a hold on them Coach.