NASCAR HAS CHEERLEADERS
08.29.07You're not gonna get any smarter watching the California Speedway Girls' training video, but something tells me that's not the point.
The point is, it's all about the umbrellas. Because… um… It might rain in California? Because NASCAR is serious about them not getting sunburned? Fuck, man. Why they gotta make it complex? Just make them do a dance routine where they shake their T&A. It doesn't need to be complicated. It's not rocket science or brain surgery or getting rid of a hooker's corpse. I'm just here for the boners, I'm not interested wetness protection in case of precipitation.
[FanHaus]
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/05/JeffreyEarnhardt-MMA-180x180.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/05/nma-taiwan-animation-cowboys-cheerleader-180x180.jpg)
With the umbrellas, I think NASCAR and the California Speedway Girls are missing the whole point of bukkake.
Am I a traitor to my race if I say Vilayna is the hottest California Speedway Girl, by far?
Where the black women at?
That was the most intense NASCAR training program I've seen. And I've seen many, like that one race car movie with Tom Cruise… Losin' It. The acting was better too…
"I'm just here for the boners."
What is 'Things you should never say when a chick asks where your relationship is going', Alex?
The only lines any of them should be reciting on film are "are you the pool boy?" and "You are SO BIG!"
@hardawayhatesyou: Judging by your avatar I always thought you were a black guy. I guess I shouldn't judge a book by its cover or um fetishes.
Yeses all across the board, including that frumpy schoolmarm who appears to be running the show. She looks like she's got a lot of pent-up nerd aggression, like that band-camp broad from American Pie.
take out the black and asian girl, and Im pretty sure the rest were all the same person.
@Careless: No, South Side of Chicago Irish. Im the rare lily white dude who likes big butts.
This one time, at NASCAR Cheerleader Umbrella Noblesse Training Camp…
Ahh the good ol' days at CUNT-Camp 2007
I'm a huge NASCAR fan (go ahead fuckers… take your shots) and I've never seen official raceway girls. But you can be damn sure and any track you go to (except probably watkins glen, canada) you will see tightly dressed slores, who take their tops off at will. So, fuck these posers with umbrellas, we've already got hick girls with big tits, low self esteem, and busch light.
Or as one of my senior NCOs once said, "This isn't rocket surgery." Nope, not much is.
@ WeakSideWing:
So…ever see that OU girl from the SEC Poon pic at the speedway? Sounds like she meets all the criteria.
Umbrellas?
Did I get a NSFW version of that clip? Why didn't they take their clothes off and do a daisy chain on the start/finish line? Damnit!
@Vinceneilyoung… I actually think I banged her out at Daytona right after her brothers tag teamed her. Her tits were a little smaller back then and she looked more like a sheep.
With a good redneck draw
Hey there little lady, did you know that racecare spelled backwards is RACECARE?
@WeakSideWing11 – "we've already got hick girls with big tits"
unfortunately, most of them have big everything else too… (except IQs… zing!)
That number again is 800-944-RACK.
When do the tracks get mascots?
I'm just here for the boners
That pretty much sums up the internets.
^^^
And Minneapolis restrooms.
Only "I hate my guidance counselor" lady in the glasses has a pearl necklace. Mistakes were made.
Only "I hate my guidance counselor" lady in the glasses has a pearl necklace. Mistakes were made.
Why did the brunette have to open her ugly mouth?
the asian chick, Jamie, is from the real world san diego. oh goddamnit, i just admitted to watching the real world. she's hot though.