07.06.07 REMEMBER INDOOR SOCCER? YOU WILL NOW.

Whats up with the dude wearing a labcoat? Is he the team physician? Because he's doing a shitty job. No one on that team looks healthy.

Blazin Hazen thinks this rap sucks. 

was there some requirement in the 80's that all professional sports teams have music videos that make richard simmons work out tapes look as masculine as rambo

Laugh now, but more prominent acts like the 85 Bears owe a debt of gratitude to the Shockers.  In their own way, they were the Sonic Youth of mid-80s athlete videos.

Where do I send the bill to for my new monitor? I spit coke all over mine when they bought out the wheelchair kids.

Four minutes of my life…….gone. 

God kills a kitten everytime you abuse your goalie.

Ufford, makeup your damn mind: If you want your loyal readers to stop saying that soccer is 100% bus-station-gay, you can't keep posting shit like this. 

Well, that's one for the thumb all right.

Un-bee-lee-vah-bhul

Denny Blaze nods his head in solidarity.

"Those guys have some great moves. Who knew soccer players were such great dancers?"

-Mark Madsen

"That was fucking gay, guys."

 -Mike Tice

Why God, why?

i've said it more than once, no other decade has produced more bad team promo vids.  the "86 mets even laughed at that video.

o.k. lets see

bad raping- check

subtle homosexuality - check

team memebers pretending to play instruments - check 

o.k., that video meets all the requirements for another bad team video from the '80's 

Co60 - is there ever such a thing as a good "raping"?

 I kid because I care.

Marissa Miller raping me would be good.

The only good "raping" happens in prison, when the White Brotherhood has sweet love made to it in the shower. But that's just me, and I'm sort of an old fashioned romantic.

Wait, which one is Feathers and which one is Cadillac?

Awful. I've seen more entertainment in my stool.

I'm speechless…All i can utter are some immortal words from my hero,  Ron Burgundy…

"Go fuck yourself, San Diego"

Now you're on my home turf!   Hustler Club, formerly Pacers, is a nice watering hole about two blocks from the Sports Arena.  Ask for "Storm" and you won't be disappointed.   Although, she's on the "A" team, so Thurs. thru Sat. after 8pm is recommended.

And what kind of name is the "Sockers"? It's like the kid with the helmet naming his dog, "dawgy". 

Ok, well Elijah Dukes might have named his dog that too… 

laugh all you will faithful readers. When a team wins 10 titles in 11 years (greatest dynasty in sports history, look it up) they are obligated to make such a mess. With players such as Brank Segota, Julie Vee ("double deuce, triple E!"), Jacques Laduceour and Steve Zungul (thats zhungull like jungle), doin' the homo nasty on the indoor turf is a natural progression.

Start practicing your lines, Beckham.