Leo Messi, for those of you who don't know, is a young soccer player who is basically the second coming of Christ in Argentina. Or the second coming of Diego Maradona, which is the same thing as "Christ in Argentina," but with a coke habit that would put the '86 Mets to shame.
And now women are hurling themselves out of the stands for a chance to hug him. Chicks powerless to his sex appeal, compelled by irresistible hormones to endanger themselves for a chance to touch a walking, tick-tocking sex bomb. Welcome to my world, Leo. I moved to Brooklyn just because there were too many tall buildings in Manhattan. I care about the ladies' safety.
(Muchas gracias: The Offside)


1st
"Oh man, I remember when it was like that for me. Girls screaming, chasing me down the street…anonymous sex, you name it. Good times…
…so…uh…you going to finish that cheeseburger?"
-David Cassidy
They then arrested her, took her to Argentine jail, and sodomized her. I hope it was worth it. All for a hug that had about as much emotion as when the hobos try to hug me after I give them my leftover Wicked Western Chimichanga from Tumbleweed.
No, fuck you. I dont care if you were a veteran, I dont have any extra sour cream.
Was that Spiderpig?
Something like that happened to me once, except it was a gay retard with a drooling problem.
if i had a penny for every girl who threw themselves at me like that…. i might be able to pay for a lap dance from the swampdonkey's at Cherry Valley Golf Club. 10 cent text message though? nope
Make it rain!
(and when i say girl i mean beautiful woman, cuz i'll rack up those ugly chicks like a fiend)
What do you mean my insurance doesn't cover injuries sustained while tossing myself off of a balcony like a PCP fueled super hero in an attempt to hug a celebrity? That was not made clear by my benefits administrator.
ugly women have vaginas too
Meanwhile, Tevez has to pay for it
I think Browns management might not be happy with their new QB injuring himself in Argentina.
If that happened here, you know she'd be suing the shit out of him, stating that he failed to catch her, thus resulting in her broken legs…plus mental anguish of never being able to watch a soccer game again without reliving the horror of that tragic fall…
Today he has women throwing themsleves at him. Tomorrow, when he misses the winning goal, he'll have people shooting at him.
It's not like this kind of shit doesn't occur in the U.S. But in America, it's fat drunk men falling on people at Shea.
I love how security, after initially descending on her, steps back and allows the hug.
"What you think? She's only a 4 out of 10 on the Crazy Scale. I think we can let her through."
"Beautiful, naked, big-tittied women don't just fall from the sky!"
I had that happen once… but she dropped on me, kicked my ass, and stole my wallet. and it wasn't a she, it was the whole Bengals football team.
she needs to work on her timing and she did not stick the landing but apparently drank a nice big glass of crazy that day
I can't believe you haven't shown this yet. Click on the video of Eddie George singing karayoke. Wait about a minute or so, so you can see Chris Weinke dance like a real white boy does.
[www.cstv.com]
Jumping down just to hug him? Either she's underage or he is (I'm not up to date on my international second coming of Christ soccer superstars). At least tickle his pickle or something for that effort. I know he doesn't have beads, but maybe flash him. That's a story everyone can enjoy when she's in the hospital recovering from a fractured ass.
Bob Ueker is not amused
For someone who couldn't possibly know she wasn't a T3000 sent from the future to kill him before he one day leads the soccer-playing resistance against the machines and topples Skynet, he's remarkably composed.
"Today he has women throwing themsleves at him. Tomorrow, when he misses the winning goal, he'll have people shooting at him"
And that's when he'll be crucifed like Hey-zus cristo.
Yeah, but did she catch the extra point or what?
Nice to see Garingo is still inserting miscellaenous Y's in his comments.
Leo Messi be done with yo bruised coccyx
He has a growth hormone disorder, and since he's joined Barcalona, he's grown 8 inches…
He's 5'6 now.
She gets all the negatives of saying "Leo Messi and I had a special moment, then when I woke up my ass really hurt," and none of the positives.
Yeah, but it's a good kinda hurt