07.18.07 MORE MICHAEL VICK GOODNESS
For those of you who are wondering about the Michael Vick "Ookie" stuff, look no further than this eerily prescient/ironic 2004 interview he did with Page 2 (as noted on PFT and later TBL). Some excerpts:
If you could have one superpower — the strength of 100 men, invisibility, or the ability to fly — which would you choose and why?
Vick: Oh, man invisibility. If I was in a bad situation or something or I said something or you know, caught with two girls I could just disappear. I could be gone just like that — no trouble.
They're taking it all away tomorrow — the fame, the fortune, everything. What do you do tonight, your last night?
Vick: I'd play Madden. Play it all night until my fingers fall off.
A few more choice answers that would probably be very different three years later after the jump. In the meantime, I strongly recommend everyone check out this splentacular post from LOL Jocks, which is where I got the image on the left.
If you could take one career mulligan — do one thing over — what would it be and what would you do differently?
Vick: No question. That Philly game [NFC Championship game]. Just playing that Philly game one more time.
Describe the ideal Michael Vick day.
Vick: Just playing video games all day long, maybe do a little fishing.
Describe the Michael Vick nightmare day.
Vick: Any day when I don't win.
What's left, what's ahead, what have you not done that you still want to do?
Vick: I want to go on a safari trip. I want to go to a jungle where I can see all kinds of tigers and elephants because I love animals. Just hop on the wagon and go. East Africa or someplace, hey, wherever it is, that's what I want to do.
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MORE MICHAEL VICK GOODNESS
"What's left, what's ahead, what have you not done that you still want to do?"
Vick: I want to go on a safari trip. I want to go to a jungle where I can see all kinds of tigers and elephants because I love TO KILL AND TORTURE animals. Just hop on the wagon and go KILL AND TORTURE ANIMALS. East Africa or someplace, hey, wherever it is AS LONG AS I CAN KILL AND TORTURE ANIMALS, that's what I want to do.
"I love animals. I especially love the sounds they make when you zap 'em with a car battery til they fur starts smokin'."
Vick is sick. He's done nothing….the only thing he's every REALLY scored was herpes.
i'm a little surprised that anyone w/ that much money would make a decision THIS awful. good for him. i love when jaded people like me are proven wrong and innocent.
What's left, what's ahead, what have you not done that you still want to do?
Vick: I'd like to get a dog. I love dogs. Me and Elijah Dukes.
Spain fucked up with Durant, but she definitely should not go home with Vick. His house sounds like a fixer at best. Also, the herp.
San Diego is starting to look like the model of the NFL. They trade Ookie and get LT, among other picks, AND they trade Eli and get Phillip Rivers, among others picks. They ALMOST made up for drafting Ryan Leaf.
thanks to BDD, I can no longer read these Vick interview exceprts without picturing him being high while he does it. Odds are he was high anyway, though.
What's left, what's ahead, what have you not done that you still want to do?
I have nothing left, except a tainted image of myself and my fucked up brother. Whats ahead is a few years in federal prison, where I get my salad tossed by Pacman, and a guy named BUBBA. I still want to get into cock fighting, and maybe some child pornography.
That invisibility thing sure sounds like a good idea…
-Pacman Jones
I want to go to a jungle where I can see all kinds of tigers and elephants…
and make those bitches fight. <massive bong rip> Oh man, have you ever seen a tiger that hasnt eaten for two weeks get shocked with a cattle prod? They are not happy. This one time, Marcus got real stoned and beat on this elephants nuts with a sledgehammer and threw him in the cage with a rhino, a lion, and three hyenas. It was our own Ultimate Fighting Animal Kingdom up in that bitch.
I'm sorry, but when did getting caught with two women become a "bad situation?"
What's left, what's ahead, what have you not done that you still want to do?
Not right, something normally found under a hat and, y'know, Nietzsche says: "Out of chaos comes order." So i think i'll give nihilism a whirl. Does dog fighting count?
Mama Vick must be so proud of her boys…
I'm sorry, but when did getting caught with two women become a "bad situation?"
When one of them is your wife and the other is your wife's younger sister. Unless of course they're both ok with that. Usually they're not. Well la di da your majesty…etc.
What's left, what's ahead, what have you not done that you still want to do?
I wanna breed dogs. Like i wanna mix a pit bull with a shitzu…to make a "Bull Shitzu".
Geezus, I had always managed to avoid the photos of the dogs until I clicked on that link. Holy moly. Maybe slap a NSFW warning or something on that link, eh?
For those of you who are wondering about the Michael Vick "Ookie" stuff,
Who the hell wondered that?
Not i sir, for i don't care.
Sorry boyd, i'm bored!
To borrow a line from a friend's father: Fucking kid should have been a blow job.
(He wasn't a very good father).
This is how Joey Harrington becomes an elite NFL QB (humourless punchline or frightening prediction? i don't know…)
Where have i heard that before?……… eeerm?
What's left, what's ahead, what have you not done that you still want to do?
Oh I don't know….I've always wanted to flush everything down the toilet–the money, my talent, my fame–and get ass raped in prison for the better part of a decade after being indicted and convicted on federal dog fighting/killing charges. Oh….I'd also like to win the Super Bowl on the All-Madden level of Madden 08.
Before Vick executed any loser, do you think he sent them text messages of jumper cables, or rope, or of a sledghammer.
"You dead..dawg"
"So, Jake. You're out of jail, you're rehabilitated. What's up? What's happening? What's Next? You got that money you owe us mother fucker?"
Doogie,
The only cock fights in prison are the chickenless ones.
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