I’m embarrassed it’s taken this long for me to get these photos up on this sex-driven site, but here they are: Maria Sharapova, in leather — you bite your fucking tongue, Berman! — strutting her stuff at the 15th annual ESPY sporting awards in Los Angeles this past week.
Did you know that Sharapova is like, 6’4”, 6’5” in heels? I had no idea she was that freaking tall. And now I’m gonna have to tell her that she can’t be seen in public with me anymore. Yeah, it sucks. But I don't want to be seen with a freak, you know? Ugh. It gives me the creeps just thinking about it.
Um, what else? What else can I possibly ramble on about to make this post look a little longer? Hmmm…
Oh, you didn’t know that’s what I was doing? Well, I am. In fact, I’m actually under strict directions from Ufford to always make sure the text stretches to at least the bottom of the photo. Especially when I incude a photo gallery. He was really mean about it, too. He said that if I ever fucked up and didn't follow his style guide, he was going to come up to Canada and rape my— Oh! Looks like I made it! Phew. -Skeetsies
(Thanks to Lloyd_Carr_Pool_Lane for the tip and avatar.)
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/226/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/04/mcilroy-wozniacki-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/03/agnieszka-radwanska-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/03/LMFAO-5-180x180.jpg)
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You are all welcome for the new files in your collective spank banks!
Next post title: HOW WYSIWYG SAVED MY LIFE
She has a very "kneel before Zod" vibe working.
Your picture captions made for an entertaining read. Much more entertaining then the photos themselves. Sorry, unless she is whipping some dwarfs in Smurf costumes while discovering other uses for tennis racket handle, those pics don't really do it for me. Or was that too crass?
who is the other chick
I'm a breast guy.
where's 289 to include the obligatory whips and chains?
It's good to know that this site has standards…because I don't.
I'd go baseline for that.
Somewhere Martina Navratilova is jerking off
Billie Jean King's testicles are going to get a work from this one
ahh, logjammin BEAT me to the punch….kinda
Tennis cuties always seem to lose their aura when not on court, or in a bikini. I'd expect a mail order bride to dress better than that and hopefully cook a mean beef stroganoff. C'mon Olga, i'm starving.
@Steve DeBerg: Her name is Camilla Belle Star of such great films as the remake of When A Stranger Calls & The Patriot (the Steven Segal one not the Gibson one)
That star shouldn't have been capitalized.
haha that guy in the off-white suit in the 2nd picture is totally checking out the ass of the girl in the black pants.. my new hero
Uh-oh, I just committed another unforced error.
You're with me, Maria.
Oh yeah! Im LOLing all over myself. <Peter your so witty. You've got Doin it Well locked up for sure now.>
jpanther: also, in that 2nd pic, Maria's nipples are poking through the leather!!! Those are some super nips! (look real closely).
I would totally be her "BALL BOY"…..lol…Get it? Ball boy?? HUMPH!!!
I wonder what you can get away with while Ufford's gone?
"I’m actually under strict directions from Ufford to always make sure
the texthis dick stretches to at leastthe bottom of the photo. my epiglottis."There. Fixed it.
Suddenly these postings are starting to suck! Friday the 13th has cursed "the leather"…..start over putz'!
Between the leather and the cold expression on her face, she looks like a Bond villian who'd cut you in half with some sort of laser-based S&M equipment and not even think twice about it. Admittedly, you'd probably die with a smile on your face.
Yeah, she can kneel before me anytime. This is the best she's ever looked.
I was going to write something whitty and clever here, but I just came, so I have to clean up.
Couldn't you just make the picture shorter? I don't think anyone would have noticed if she had no head.
Aggreived is right. The only time I've ever seen her smile is in the fucking camera commerical with her dog. And it looked like they were giving her electric shocks to make it happen.
Some other chick is NICE. Sharapova….great legs – but that's about it, but you know what…that's enough. I'd make a kabob out of her.
These pictures improved my groundstroke.
I agree with BlackCapricorn, the comments made along with the photos seem to brighten everyone's day, you kickass Skeetsies, job well done, by they way, Marja is highly overrated, she got nothing on the lovely Anna, and in turn Anna has got nothing on tennis.
Too tall…I'd be 69'ing her belly button.
Man what I wouldnt do for a threesome with her and the Steelers jersey thief
Sigh — here goes:
I love to pound her baseline with my ace
The score is LOVE – LOVE
Was that shot in or out?
I dinked one over the net and it just dribbled onto her court.
Her forehand is better than her backhand.
And on and on it goes… why is tennis so full of innuendo?
Here's another one…I just made an unforced error…IN MY PANTS, HI-YOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
She looks pretty good for someone that bi-weekly sucks embalming fluid out of Lenin's cock.
Maria makes my naugahyde pants go crazy!
Regarding the third picture, I'd like to be the baloney in that sandwich. I gots the mayonaise.
She has quickly become the most overrated womens tennis player ever. I mean, shes cute, but she's nothing you can't find in any downtown urban area.
Of course, I'd still beast heavily.
O my shit!
when it comes to this chick i am powerless in every way….
I'm sorry guy's, i have to leave again,
to give it six nowt!