Kansas City Royals outfielder Emil Brown shot a television reporter near the eye with a plastic pellet gun on Friday afternoon.  I know this exciting story was all over the interwebs yesterday, but now we have thrilling video: 

Maybe this is a desperate cry for attention from the Royals.  They are like the Fredo Corleone of the American League: sent off to a western city to babysit a miniscule part of the operation.  We know you're bitter, but that's no reason to Mo Green a female TV reporter.  And don't even think of moving your franchise to Havana with the help of your pal Johnny Ola after Castro dies, or else you'll end up reciting Hail Marys on a fishing boat with the commissioner's dean of discipline. -KD