I always feel guilty when I write a Mariners post, because most of you sexy readers can't find Seattle on a map. Hell, I'm surprised most of you can read. And I know for a fact there are a handful of you that only look at the pictures.
But it's noteworthy that Ichiro! Suzuki extended his hitting streak to 24 games with a 3-for-5 night, tying the team record held by franchise stalwart Edgar Martinez Ken Griffey Jr Joey Cora, as the Mariners continued to hover above .500 with a 9-5 win over the struggling Rangers. The Mariners racked up 14 hits, 13 of them singles. Ah, Safeco. I believe the power alleys extend to Vancouver.
For the Rangers, roid-alicious DH Sammy Sosa struck out four times, and starter Vicente Padilla fell to 2-8 by giving up seven runs in his three innings of work. He's like Jeff Weaver, but with two more wins, and cheaper.
Other MLB news: Prince Fielder hit his NL-leading 19th homer (giving him 13 for the month) as the Brew Crew beat the Marlins 4-3… The Orioles have won six in a row?… Shawn Chacon pitched masterfully, but the Padres won in 11 over the Pirates. Just for fun, Josh Bard and Bud Black got ejected for arguing a reversed home run call by the umpire crew… Mark Buerhle only gave up two hits, but they were both solo home runs that gave Rot Halladay and the Blue Jays a 2-0 victory. Whatsa matter, Buehrle? Can't throw a no-hitter?
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I bet he is gentle when he is in bed. A real gentlemen. Is that gay?
wait, you're saying that Jeff Cirillo never had a 24 game hitting streak for the Mariners??? bullshit!
"Whatsa matter, Buehrle? Can't throw a no-hitter?"….Why must you hurt me, Matt?
most of you sexy readers can't find Seattle on a map
At least we're not stupid enough to put Jeff Weaver back in the rotation.
If he gets anywhere near a 50 game hit streak, are the Yankees going to exhume Joltin' Joe's corpse, so he can present Ichiro with the exhumed corpse/ashes of Marilyn Monroe to celebrate his accomplishment?
Instead of that, I would venture to guess that Steinbrenner would hire an assassin, or Todd Bertuzzi, to make sure that Ichiro wouldn't be able to maintain the streak.
So what if I only look at the pictures?! Pictures are worth a thousand words! So by looking at the pictures, I'm actually reading!!
*Side note: Adam Sandler's 'Big Daddy': "He can't even read!"
Seattle???? What’s a Seattle??
Of course I can't find Seattle on a map… I've never even seen a map of Canada.
Mock "Little" Joey Cora all you want, but he stands fourth behind only Harold Reynolds, Bret Boone and Jose Lopez on the list of all-time Seattle second-sacker greats. So, there's that.
Hugh,
Well you certainly don't want to stand "in front" of Harold Reynolds.
Just ask that poor girl from the Boston Market incident.
Timmy, anyone could miss Canada. All tucked away down there.
Canada? Why would we want to visit America Jr.?
Oh canada you are the number one importer of potassium. Oh wait your not? Is Kobe from Canada? Was he? No he is not? or is he?
Pff. With traffic as bad as it is here, im pretty sure most the drivers on the freeways cant Seattle.
Go M's!
Seattle? Isn't that where Durant played that one year?
NO RED SOX OR YANKEES COVERAGE,
Perhaps the most inspired tag yet (outside the "whoo boy that's gay" tag).
Kudos
That's a picture of a Japanese baseball player. Not why I come here! (That came out wrong.)
In other baseball news, the Tigers trotted out their number one starter and held the Indians to 11 runs.
I hate the Blue Jays too, but Rot Halladay is an awful anti-nickname.
if harold reynolds is your best 2nd baseman ever, and bret boone is a close second, your franchise has some serious problems. ouch.
I know Joey Cora had a ton of testicular fortitude, but I never thought he had enough balls to make him worthy of Second Sack greatness
"because most of you sexy readers can't find Seattle on a map."
All I have to do is follow the trail of broken, discarded venti cups.
Coming tomorrow: an exhaustive list of the all-time Mariner left fielder greats.
ko, what teams have a great 2nd baseman history, especially one thats only been in existence for about 30 years?
I can see the quote from Ichiro now if he breaks the record:
"I'm very happy I hit the ball so much. Sometimes it seems like the ball is going to go into the catchers glove, but then it goes onto the bat and I hit it. I feel always that I must support my team by hitting the ball. I can feel it when I am not hitting the ball, the ball is not going into the field and my team is not gaining strength form my presence, How can the team win when I am sucking its strength like an evil fairie from te dead-world?"
Muck….that quote is WAY too clear for anything Ichiro would say……you would need in the middle something about a car, a unicorn and a small villiage in Samoa.