POLE VAULTING IS SEXY, BARELY LEGAL
05.08.07
Long-time reader Jim — who may or may not have killed a man in prison — alerted me this morning to an Internet sensation that's building a frightening head of steam: meet pole vaulter Allison Stokke (pronounced "stow-key," I believe). Hubba hubba and other grunting sounds.
Why is this particular head of steam frightening, you ask? Well, as best as I can tell from my rudimentary Internet sleuthing, Allison turned 18 less than two months ago, and she's still a senior at Newport Harbor, which last time I checked — and I check often — is a high school. Writing these kinds of posts are precisely why I keep getting mysterious, threatening voicemails from someone that sounds like Chris Hansen. "I'll get you, Ufford!" "You disgust me, sicko!" "Seriously, put some pants on." Et cetera and so on.
Oh, and there's also this: Miss Stokke is one of the best young pole vaulters in the country. She set the U.S. record for a freshman girl at 12'8", and her present personal best is a couple inches off the best high school girls mark. So, that's why I'm honoring her with a post. Because she's an exceptional athlete. Yes.
Oh, and if this YouTube interview is any indication, she takes pole vaulting so seriously that she's unable to detect sarcasm. Which is too bad, because missing sarcastic remarks ends our steamy, illicit romance before it's even begun. That, and the age difference. And the restraining order.
UPDATE: Please go HERE for more pics and some insight into this phenomenon.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/04/ryne-elvers-hits-bird-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/FULL-COURT-ALLEY-OOP-HIGH-SCHOOL-180x180.png)
Thank. You.
Can she clear 9″?
Also, the left side of her mouth doesn’t move as much as the right side when she talks. That’s a deal breaker. God, try as I might I couldn’t type that with a straight face.
No? How about 2″?
impressive. most impressive.
Is it me or does she just look like a typical non-sex kitten high school girl in those other thumbnails but the lead picture makes her look like I need to introduce her to my locked basement for several months?
I am old.
I believe this post meets the legal definition of entrapment.
What the hell is up with her right hand in the first picture
It’s rolled underneath, proper form.
I am right there with you HHY but I am just hoping girls like her are drawn to older men who have no appreciable income.
Here is my question, if those pictures are of her last year or even two years ago, aren’t we basically looking at pictures of a 16 year old? Kind of creepy.
I don’t give a damn if she is an “athlete” or not. If she is 18, hot, and wears a uniform that damn tight…she’s worthy of a post!
Where’s the “jailbait” tag?
For an 18 year old, she really knows how to handle a pole.
Remember when we were kids? We used to play “jailbait tag” for hours.
The way girls are developing is almost sinister. Good luck to her and lets hope she continues so we can see more of her.
That’s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.
We need some pictures of her pooper!
Tomorrow I will turn 32. So she is half my age plus two years. And beyond that bit of math hurting my brain, I have to go and delouse myself or something.
Wow…
Looks like that impulse purchase of a crash mat disguise might not be so stupid after all. Okay, wearing it on a stag do to the races wasn’t very clever – getting through the turnstile was no picnic – but now…
Nicely done, Dikembe.
Picture #3: is that her “O” face? And Hail, isn’t the rule half your age + 7? Can I get a ruling on this?
is the main pic photoshopped? It seems much better than all the others. damn I love athletic chics.
She can vault my pole any time.
//obligatory
I also approve of The Strokes song title in the post title.
Wow. WithLeather is on point. I figured when I sent y’all the original picture, you’d find more, but video? That’s why you guys make the big bucks.
@Ryan. Give Hail a break, it’s (almost) his birthday.
Am I the only one afraid of this chick’s grip strength?
I love how this post has been up like two hours, and we already have almost 30 comments. You put a hot barely legal piece of ass up there, and us pervs will come a callin.
OK, since it’s not been said yet: YES
you know you all wanted to say it….
That type of handling and skill usually takes years to develop.
[www.dyestatcal.com]
Any suckers for pigtails here?
She’s wearing a Cal sweatshirt in pic #5, and she immediately becomes the hottest girl to go to Cal or wear Cal apparel in 30 years. That school’s so overrun with fat Asians and dirty hippies it’s beyond saving.
Unless Ms. Stokke goes there. Best education on the West Coast, Allison! Go Bears!
It appears someones already used the Wooderson quote. Fuck!
[www.facebook.com]
PERVERTS!
And somewhere Jenn Sterger sheds a tear.
I’d like to make amateur porn with her, and by amateur porn; I mean have sex with her and record it.
Thanks for the clarification, hodgedup. Hey Matt, is 40 comments the all time withleather record?
Didn’t the Amaechi post have more comments?
“Long time reader Jim”
Hopefully you are talking about the length of time Jim has been able to read, because this site has only been around for like 7 months.
Yeah but Ryan…that was like, real journalism. This is a 17-18 year old chick fondling a big long stick.
Great thread. lol at hodgedup
Wait now I am confused about what “real journalism” really is?
commentary on the youtuve click, 42 comments on the post, and not one mention of her admittal of injuring herself from falling in the box? he-llo!!!
ClownMode: and I’ve been here for all seven.
you guys are sick shit. look at the first thumbnail, she’s just a kid you fucks.
48 comments until the obligatory holier than thou b.s.
@zonker: 18 is legal in all 50 states. but, then his avatar is a dude with his face in another dudes ass, so….I’m just sayin’…
WooHoo….50!!!!!!
Wow….I got page 2 all to myself….hmm….where should I put the bar?? OK…hot tub goes up by Allison and her pole…..
She’s 18. She can vault my pole anytime. I’m also not an old timer so wouldn’t feel guilty at all either way.
For more than barely legal hot pole vaulters, I suggest this…
http://www.vaultgirls.com
I swear the only reason I know about this is ’cause my friend is in it. I much prefer “Gods of the Stadium” featuring bare-assed rugby players w/ hot accents.
I’d Zonker.
That ain’t a jailbait rack. That’s a barely legal rack. And it’s a damned fine one, too.
Why is the main picture 100 times better than the thumbnail pics? Is that photoshopped or does she only look good through the side??
and has anyone seen the facebook link?? One of them is a picture of Chris Hansen. good stuff hahaha
I feel guilty looking at her. I mean, honestly, I am old enough to be her sugar daddy.
Fixed.
[userlame.com]
You sickos, while she is 18 today, she is under 18 in every single one of those pictures. Some of them are from her freshman year of high school.
There are plenty of hot pole vaulters out there that are out of high school. Google Tracy O’Hara or Dana Ellis or pretty much any elite pole vaulter out there.
can she code?
i’d pay 100 dollars to eat the corn out of her shit.
@polevaultpower,
I know you mean well, I really do, but I’m WAY to lazy to do that. How bout you throw a couple nekkid pics up of those folks you mentioned? No? Guess I’ll just have to make do with Ufford’s then.
“Pole Vaulter”
Hee hee.
Lets hope she wins a medal and ends up in Playboy 2 years later. Or that she doesnt and ends up in Penthouse.
Im good either way…
@zonker: maybe a little dick in your mouth would calm you down. She’s 18, you big homo,… that’s 5 years older than R.Kelly likes them.
I find it most interesting that this website is posting photos of a young athlete that was a MINOR when these photos were taken, not too mention the fact that several of the photos ( including the lead photo ) were taken by professional track and field photographer, Victah Sailor.
I don’t believe that Mr. Sailor gave his permission for the authorized use of these photos. My guess is that once he sees the unauthorized use of his photos on this website, their is a very strong possibility of a lawsuit for copyright infringement.
Good Luck.
Mr. Sailor has a fantastic eye for the art of Photography and it appears that he has obviously earned accolades from the members of this site. He should be proud of his work… he managed to catch the essence of a blossoming flower, she just happens to be supper hot. These pictures are all over the internet so if your a parent or sibling of Allison instead of griping you should be convincing her to get an agent, and go PRO Ana Kournikova was 16 and she sucked but went on to become the highest paid (endorsements) tennis player in the world. Who cares about measurable talent? She has the only talent she needs.
Since this website is suppose to have an interest in athletics, I thought you might like to know that Miss Stokke is ranked 2nd in the State of California in the Girls PV, with a personal best of 13-07 this season.
The leader is UCLA bound Tori Anthony, who has set a National outdoor record of 13-10.
Miss Stokke and Miss Anthony are the next Stacy Draghila’s.
Their future athletic performances in the pole vault will someday be world class. You are talking about the two best high school vaulters in the Nation.
When all is said and done, Kournikova will have nothing on these two young women because they will have gone to the Olympics and cashed in their “medals” in more ways than one.
Good for both of them!!!! As an Olympic track and field fan, I’ll look forward to seeing them in the near future.
Stokke looks better than Anthony, for the record. Yeah, I can be shallow like that sometimes.
wow
@Pro Photografer
Have you ever been on the beach and looked at a guy/girl thinking they where hot? Ever seen a person so beautiful you just had to turn around while walking? Ever said "wow, she's really hot"?
If not, welcome to our planet.
There's nothing bad about looking/making comments about a minor. Its not even bad to have a quicky with mrs. righty/lefty to pictures of a minor. Lets face the facts here. She's not hot, she's beautiful. Actually I can go as far as saying this might be the best looking woman I've ever seen.
BUT I wont do anything about it. I wont go sleep outside of her window. I wont break into her house and kidnap her. I wont even try to make contact with her!
What I WILL do is to use my right as a human beeing and look at these pictures. And dont forget, and I quote:
"These high-res photos are new to the Internet, and I'm posting them with the written permission of the photographer. "
So don't tell me to take my sexuality and shove it. I like woman. Beautiful women, and I will continue to look at pictures of them as much as I want.
Oh, and don't even think about making a remark about my nickname, its a nickname for my original nickname (Stiffler).
Thank you very much for reading. Enjoy the pics with a clear mind guys. Don't let people like this moron tell you what to do!
This is by far the best collection of pics…
[sportswrap.berecruited.com]
See my take on the Allison Stokke privacy issue at [mytvmusings.com]
Zonker
Are you saying that if she were not "a kid" that she would be fair game to de-humanize through crude sexual objectification? If I were you, I'd be crying out, "she's a human-being, you fucks!" That's just my opinion though… and that of anyone else who doesn't hate women.
Take a look at Desiree Ficker – Super HOT Triathlete!!!
Her dad is a JERK! [feministing.com]
YOU GUYS ARE ALL SICK!!! She's only 18 for Christ's sake. Sure she is pretty, but you all don't have to say sexually explicts comments about her. Half of you sickos could be her father!!!
As for the writer, you should be a shame of yourself. All you care is about people coming to your site and getting hits when here Allison's own safety is on the line. Take this article down now. You all disgust me.
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