MICHAEL VICK IS PRETTY MUCH SCREWED
05.16.07
Children, let this be a lesson: while few things in life are as satisfying as running an illegal dogfighting operation in your rural enclave, it's just not worth the risk if you're also an NFL quarterback. Just look at the latest piece of bad news for Michael Vick:
Kathy Strouse, the animal control coordinator for the City of Chesapeake in Virginia which is investigating the case at the Smithfield home, told Yahoo.com on Tuesday she has spoken with individuals who can "put Vick on that property" during matches. Saying she is "very confident" that Vick will be tied directly to the dog fighting on the property, Strouse has challenged Surry County Commonwealth attorney Gerald Poindexter to bring charges…
Strouse indicated that the individuals who place the Falcons quarterback at the scene have been reluctant to testify. In Virginia, dogfighting is a felony and punishable by up to five years in prison.
Man, a year ago, what were the odds that Michael Vick would go to jail before his brother Marcus? 20-1? I can't believe this family's bad judgment. Think about it: if you're a famous millionaire, do you set up an illegal dogfighting operation, or do you round up a dozen sexy groupies and have a weekly Vaseline Wrestling Night?
Related must-read: the latest of Vick's offseason adventures at KSK
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Maybe Mike can get Marcus to serve the jailtime for him – its not like he’s doing anything else. (And you just know the Wayans Bros. would option the rights to the story for their next movie failure.)
So if you’re Mr. & Mrs. Vick, at what point do you look at your children and realize, “We must not be very good parents”?
You think Vick’s parents are married and living together? Oh, that’s so cute.
Ha ha ha… Poindexter…
What would Vaseline wrestle? Lubriderm? K-Y?
How do you train Vaseline to be angry and go for the jugular?
I don’t know, I’d go with underfed dogs for my entertainment dollar.
Are the dozen sexy groupies the cheerleaders for said Vaseline vs. K-Y match up?
I actually heard that the dog fights were really boring, you guessed it Tim Duncan was there.
I can stomach a lot of things in this world, but dog-fighting? That’s just…awesome.
The real damage is going to come in if/when they link gambling to this operation and to Vick.
It’s a shame too. And to build off of what Matt was saying, how about Mike Vick getting in this much heat before fellow 757 friend Allen Iverson. AI antics (like throwing a chair at a pregnant woman in a bowling alley) were legendary but he’s been pretty tame of late.
Surry County? I used to live in Williamsburg- you needed to take a ferry just reach the county. It stretches from southeast VA to the Carolina border and only has 5,000 residents. There is nothing to do there except eat bbq and watch dogs fight, I don’t understand what the big deal is.
Iverson is a family man now. Kids’ll slow down your chair-throwing antics pretty good. Unless your last name is Knight.
“…do you set up an illegal dogfighting operation, or do you round up a dozen sexy groupies and have a weekly Vaseline Wrestling Night?”
Why choose? He’s Michael Frigging Vick…he could have the lubed up groupies wrestle the pit bulls!
Now THAT’s entertainment!
So is training and watching dogs kill each other supposed to prove youre a real man or something? Im no PETA member, but he deserves time. Fuckin moron.
better than jail time, just stick him and his retard brother in the pit with a couple of dogs and let ‘em loose. Let’s see the bitches try to fake out a pit bull. And he thinks Ray Lewis hit him hard.
vick is retarded. he should have had these fights in international waters, like a normal felon. there’s no jurisdiction!!
Mike Vick loves his dogs
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