With the Premiership's season over, we'll have to make do with the occasional MLS highlight. In this clip, Toronto FC (wait, Toronto has a soccer team now?) scores its first goal ever a mere five games into their existence, as Danny Dichioscores the first of three Toronto goals in a 3-1 victory over the Chicago Fire. And the long-suffering fans of Canadia celebrate by… hurling their seat cushions onto the pitch.
Just like weak-ass Canadia. Sure, the seat cushions fly real nice, but they're way too soft. And supportive of their team (the cushions AND the Canadians, that is). Listen, Toronto: pick a side. Either join America in not caring about soccer or work on inclusion in the E.U. by murdering some opposing fans in the stands and littering the field with pyrotechnics. Or at least bags of urine. C'mon, show some pride.
Video from The Offside


“Hall of Famer Karl Heintz Granitza out on the field, pleading with the crowd….”
These Canadians should take a hint from Detroit and catapult live moose out there.
Yeah their fans need to follow the leade of their player during a scuffle between Dichio and the Fire goalie Matt Pickens, Dichio decided to take a bite out of Fire midfielder Diego Gutierrez’ finger when he tried to break up the fight.
Fucking Canadians. The only thing worse than being British is wanting to be British. Add some francophilia in the form of isolated farmer stock, and you have one fucked-up country on your hands.
For extra credit, make that country impossibly cold.
Rocco, just because your asshole is bigger than your pie hole it doesn’t give you permission to talk out of it. Why don’t you take a day off of getting pipe laid up your bunghole, update your passport, break parole to come up north and taste a nice cold beer? You may like Canada after all. Putz.
Matt, why do you hate Canada so? We like you… hell, we like everybody. Why all the bad vibes? Plus, we’re bigger and on top; if this was prison, you’d be our bitch.
Other than that, keep up the great site.
Russ, in case you haven’t caught on yet, nothing here should be taken seriously. I love Canadia.
@F.: see Matt’s response. Hoser.