04.20.07 ROGER FEDERER IS A BOND VILLAIN
I've been saying for years that Roger Federer looks exactly like the villain in a James Bond movie: the close-set dark eyes, the unconvincing smile, the faint hint of a German accent. He's handsome, but not handsome enough to keep his girl from double-crossing him and sleeping with a British spy… so Federer kills her.
Most people look at me like I'm crazy when I say this, but now, as The Big Lead noted, Men's Vogue has the story and the photo slide show that prove me right. He lives in Dubai. He goes from yacht to helicopter in designer clothes. He's looking for someone who's a worthy adversary.
He loves the idea of a sanitized version of the world being made here, though, and enjoys the megalomaniacal vision of the Maktoums [Dubai's ruling family]. Two years ago on the helipad at the top of the seven-star Burj Al Arab hotel, he played Andre Agassi. It was billed as the highest game of tennis ever, and the pair of them looked out from this 700-foot perch across the globe.
Federer won, then pushed Agassi off the helipad to his death. True story. I've heard he also loads live grenades into the tennis ball machine, then fires them at his enemies.
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There are 14 comments about:
ROGER FEDERER IS A BOND VILLAIN
Tennis ball machine…or one of those American Gladiator tennis ball cannons? Because a Bond villain would totally have one of those.
It was billed as the highest game of tennis ever.
Only until I get off work today. If I could only remember where I put my tennis racket…
No HTML yet?
Regardless, I like the upgrades.
Weed, I would hope you would have an avatar.
ummm…do you repair tennis ball launchers? you do?? ok, great. let me tell you what happened: me and the boys boiled up some potatoes and fired them at each other…Roger took one straight up his ass…
Aha! This explains it all – after killing Agassi he built an Agassibot to drive Steffi Graf into his arms (as reported by El Presidente, here: http://www.withleather.com/index.phtml?s=agassi&dt= )
MU, did you ever get to visit magical Dubai when you were in the service? Well, you’d know if you had–picture someplace that is awesome, then take away everything that is awesome about it, have a physician squeeze your balls way too hard and throw a veil over every woman in town. That’s the UAE. Federer must be playing on grass to live there voluntarily.
Federer lives in Dubai… which is part of the UAE.
What is the deal in Dubai with them building islands out of sand and making homes on them? You can’t tell me that thats going to hold up over the long term.
I saw a program on tv about Dubai the other day, specifically the new islands in the shape of a palm tree that they’re building in the ocean. They said that Dubai’s wealth comes from all of their oil reserves, but they know that the oil is going to run out in something like 2016. So the prince is trying to build all this stuff in order to turn Dubai into a huge tourist attraction so that when the oil is gone, they’ll have a new source of revenue coming into the country. Otherwise, the whole country will go down the toilet. Pretty amazing, but about the only place in the world that’s taking so many extraordinary risk at the same time. They’re also building a bunch of islands in the ocean that, from the air, looks like a map of the world, as well as what will be the tallest building in the world.
Must of been a fictional tv show. Dubai’s wealth is from the Jebel Ali Free Zone, which offers lucrative business and tax incentives to corporations, and increasingly tourism. Only 3% of their revenues come from gas.
Roger Federer is a total Bad-Ass. He keeps upping the ante on the pimp-style…. fo' realz.
When he wins the US open next year, I heard he's gonna roll out into center court in a Rolls Royce, and he'll be sporting white top-hat with a feather, a mink coat, alligator shoes, a cane, a big-ass ring, and a gold necklace spanning across his chest that says "Tennis-Pimp-Daddy"
Righ-Der'.
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