For those of you who don't follow soccer — I understand this is most of you — Landon Donovan is not exactly the man's man of soccer. To put this in the right hierarchy of pretty-boys, he's kind of the Lance Bass to David Beckham's Justin Timberlake.
A prodigy in his teens, Donovan signed with a German club well before he was ready, flamed out spectacularly, then came back to the States homesick and worse for the wear. He did that twice, actually. Yet he remained a rising star of US Soccer, shining in the '02 World Cup before disappearing for an 18-month span that included the US's sorry '06 Cup. Now he plays for the LA Galaxy in MLS, afraid or unwilling to raise his game against stronger competition in pro leagues overseas.
Well, apparently, he's back. Yesterday he notched a hat trick against an Ecuador team that was starting eight players from its World Cup Squad. And the third one was a fucking rocket of an exclamation point.
You can see all the game's goals here, which are enjoyable not just for Landy not sucking, but also for Team USA's new unis. They look like an actual soccer team now. kits. They look like proper footballers now.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/226/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/soccer-field-goal-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/BKZMP0WCAAAaEgq-1-180x180.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/daniele-de-rossi-dive-justification-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/boubacar-copa-barry-180x180.png)
Get it straight! Soccer players wear kits, hockey players wear sweaters, and ultimate frisbee players wear second-hand peasant blouses.
Landon’s wife/fiance is still hot at least… well, until David Spade tags her on the set of that sitcom.
Not that I give a shit…but the ummm point of an international team’s kit is to wear the country’s colors…since when the fuck do we represent the white and baby blue?
You mean like like how Italy (red, green, and white) wears blue? Good point, Jose.
The uniforms are fucking brilliant and they’re cobalt blue. Hi-res pictures:
[blogs.orlandosentinel.com]
Yes. I am also not a pussy.
Don’t forget the fluorescent orange flag of the Netherlands. And even the blue shorts of England.
jose, how the hell are those baby blue?
Anyone know if those jerseys are available to buy?
Yes they are: [ussoccerstore.com] Didn’t realize that they’re our “3rd Jersey”.
I sat behind goal where Donovan scored twice in the second half. The rocket in the upper 90 was his second goal in under 2 minutes and the confidence was that of playing against someone he knew was already shook.
He would have had four goals, but was tackled just inside the box, but it was called just outside.
Footnote, Ecuadorians in Tampa have no good soccer songs. Our sections song leaders gave them a heavy dose of their freestyle “We have Ecuador.”
America’s general disdain for soccer is what separates us from the savages. The more we embrace this game, the faster this country’s gonna go straight down the toilet.
Although I do thoroughly enjoy how miserable a loss to America can make an entire country.
Nice to see Beasley and Donovan live up to expectations. Five years too late, but I’ll take it.
I hope Landon keeps this form up.
God I hate really dislike american soccer