COLLEGE COACH IS NEGLIGENT MOTHER
03.14.07
Caroll Russell, the coach of the University of Nebraska-Kearney womens basketball team, rushed to re-join her team in time for its blowout loss to North Dakota in the North Central Region tournament… five hours after she gave birth to her first child.
"I could have watched the Webcast, but I wanted to be there for the girls because they've been working so hard for this all year," Russell said…
[She] said her team seemed tired in the second half. Tired was something she could relate to. "I usually stand up the whole game but I didn't have the energy," said the 35-year-old Russell, who's in her fifth year as coach.
What a heartwarming tale of a coach's love for her team. "Congratulations, Mrs. Russell! It's a boy! Do you want to hold him?" — "Uh, I think this so-called 'miracle of life' can wait a couple hours. My Division-II women's team is playing in the North Central Region tournament! Just have the umbilical cord cut by the time I get back. And towel that thing off — it's all sticky and gross. Oh, and somebody should probably feed it while I'm gone. See ya!"
And then she got in her car and went 90 through a school zone because it's so great that she wanted to support her team.

Just shows how big of Divas NBA players are. Sitting out two games when your wife gives birth is poppycack. You want maternity leave Shawn kemp get knocked up.
I never thought I’d see the day when the RMAC got some ink on the inter-ebays. Ft. Lewis, bitches!
“Five hours after giving birth to her first child, Russell was back on the bench…”
in china, they call that wednesday.
i call shenanigans. nice try Ufford. you really expect me to believe that a women’s college basketball coach was having sex?
with a dude?
i think not.
This has nothing to do with the pregnant lesbian, but since I dont have the commenting ability over at deadspin, I’d like to respond to the Sports Gal’s comments about Chicago in today’s “column”:
Fuck you.
Thanks for your time.
Totally unrelated, but i’m going to fuck this chick in the Snorg Tees ad if it is the last thing I do. I know you have connections Ufford…hook me up!