The NBA found two teams from the Eastern Conference who don't completely blow last night, and made them play each other, resulting in a game that didn't entirely suck. Pretty crazy, I know, but it happened.

Gilbert Arenas — why is that name familiar? — scored 36 points and added 11 assists and 7 rebounds as the Wizards beat the Pistons 104-99 to continue their dominance at home (18-4 so far this season). Unfortunately for les boulez, Antawn Jamison left the game with an injured something-or-other (hey, read the article your damn self), so now they're down to two good players.

I'd like to feel bad for Antawn, but I can feel no sympathy for pro athletes whose names openly defy the logic of Hooked on Phonics. It's one of the reasons that no matter how luminescently he performs, Dwyane Wade can never be my favorite player.

And Laveranues Coles? You can go to hell. You go straight to hell.