01.31.07 ADAM VINATIERI STRIPPED THROUGH COLLEGE?

An anonymous reader sends this email to me and the fine fellows at Kissing Suzy Kolber, which, in the name of senseless rumor-mongering, I've decided to publish in near-entirety:

I dunno if I'm totally late to this news or what, but I was having a conversation with a friend of mine about the Super Bowl, and she remarked that she would be cheering for the Colts, because she liked Peyton Manning, and she had seen Adam Vinatieri naked.

This gave me pause.

The gist of her explanation was that she had attended South Dakota State University (Go Jackrabbits!) at the same time as Vinatieri, and as a student, he had earned extra money as a stripper for bachelorette parties and the like. My friend had attended such a party, where Vinatieri was the featured attraction, and [she] had seen the full monty, as it were.

I have no photographic evidence to substantiate this claim, but suspect it exists, if one goes looking for it…

Well, anonymous tipster, consider me looking for it. Attention, Jackrabbit alumnae and assorted women of South Dakota: please, send me pictures of Adam Vinatieri's cock. Because otherwise, as a respected news outlet, I can only say that this is a cruel rumor and totally untrue. And nobody wants that.