Jeff Gordon went down to Mexico to get married to model Ingrid Vandebosch. That would be her photo to the left that's steaming up this post.

You may remember Ingrid from the Queen Latifah-Jimmy Fallon blockbuster action comedy Taxi — what? You didn't see Taxi? Well, excuse me, Mr. Bourgeois Indie Film. Was there a Merchant-Ivory marathon that weekend? I thought Taxi was a delightful model-filled caper.

Or perhaps you read her interview in Stuff. You don't read Stuff? How can you not? It's obviously different and far superior to those Maxim and FHM rags. It was during this interview that she said the famous words,

I really love lingerie. I just like to dress in nice lingerie with lace and all that.

What a coincidence! I love it when she dresses in lingerie and all that. Man, we could have really hit it off if it weren't for that meddling Gordon. What a dick. I'll be cheering for Dale Jr from here on out. And by "cheering for Dale Jr" I mean "continuing not to care."