
San Francisco 49ers running back Frank Gore has a new agent! (horseshit registration required)
Gore signed with Miami-based [Drew] Rosenhaus last week after his first agent, David Dunn, told Gore he no longer could represent him. Dunn is facing a two-year suspension from the National Football League Players Association.
Yes, that Drew Rosenhaus. But why is Dunn facing a two-year suspension? Well, I looked it up, and there was lots of legalese that I didn't really understand, but it seemed Dunn was pretty good at extremely scheisty collusion. He also declared bankruptcy in 2003, in part to delay legal action against himself. So, naturally, Gore has picked up the single next-slimiest agent, who will almost certainly enter into an ugly negotaition process, right? AU CONTRAIRE:
"That's such a myth," said Rosenhaus, noting he quietly has brokered deals for such high-profile players as Jeremy Shockey, Chad Johnson and Anquan Boldin. "If you talk to general managers, they'll tell you we know how to get deals done. We are not obstinate."
Ugh. He's just so… slimy. I need to go shower to get all this agent off of me.


Are you going to use the Soapy Dick Pill?
And, while I’m here…a little NFL Algebra:
Former Miami ‘Cane + Drew Rosenhaus + Cheap Niners Ownership = holdout > protracted negotiations
if you were an pro athlete…which agent would be on top of your list? say what you want about the guy, he gets his clients paid…hell, he single handedly got willis mcgehee drafted in the first round despite the teams knowing they wouldnt have him for a year and not know what kind of player he would be after the injury
Drew: “Frank Gore is the best running back in the country! You won’t be disappointed!”
Team: “But you said that about Willis McGahee.”
Drew: “You are absolutely right. So are you offering my client Frank Gore a 7-year, $94 deal?”
Team: “No, not really.”
Drew: “I thought you’d say that.” [smoke bomb, vanishes]
Hey, how about that. Comments don’t have paragraph breaks.